SCEPCOP Forum

I'm not a bot I promise. I am a musician named Mike living in Southern Ontario ,53 ,and this seems like good place for me. You see musicians
aren't scientists and we are quick to go HUH? or at least the ones i know do. So I hope things can be explained to the challenged !
In my life i have gone from the mainstream Christian religions which are mostly harmless fictions to me to self help books, silva, transcendental meditation to an Ontario group called People Searching Inside in the 70's to Swedenborgianism to a 8 year run in a cult called eckankar. When I came to my senses . then I tried to go to an evangelical church though I didn't believe in any literal interpretation of bible scripture for the year i went i liked their music and performing there. Membership does have its privileges. Group goals, charitable work,etc
I liked a 19th century agnostic called Robert Ingersoll, read Dawkins, Hitchens Harris and another guy I forget Donnell?
I joke I believe I wore out my believer.
My mother goes to mass . I think the catholic cult sets my teeth on edge It seems to be a waste of breath to explain this stuff to people. Just tell em god bless and they'll go away soon.
I have a friend now that goes on about the Secret, and Wayne Dyer while he's on disability in an inner city and I've tried gently to tell tell him been there done that sounds good : religious people come up to me and I just can't deal with the insanity. That you are going to influence reality by what you think.I believe my actions lead to more results and it negative things come out of my mouth its just me working out a course of action.
so what s my point.It seem like reason goes out the window when the shit hits the fan in someones life and they pray or grab on to something or believe a secret inner master is guiding their lives and their mind conjures up justifications for what they concentrate on.
I lost my cell phone. I didn't find it because I believed I would. I found it because I retraced my steps on a cold winter night though I had a head cold.
Its like ther'es an unlocked back door to most peoples heads which has no rational guard at all and all kinds of beliefs roll in grasped upon when needed in some crisis or in childhood at paters knee.
I'm not inspired every day but I don't need a personal Jesus or fictional crutch
I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to know where many ignorant men are sure - that is all that agnosticism means.”
― Clarence Darrow
You don’t have to be brave or a saint, a martyr, or even very smart to be an atheist. All you have to be able to say is “I don’t know”.”
― Penn Jillette,


So I'll be reading as I have a lot to learn. You see I am a cult survivor.

It also sounds as if you were chasing something but didn't want to do the footwork required -- your couldn't let go of your logical/carnal processing which is the downfall of most when it comes to a "religious" atmosphere that's unfulfilling or better put, why we "fire" god here and there during our journey. . . look at the old testament and how many of the prophets shook their fist at God. In my experience the most spiritual of people are those that challenge both, god and the idea of god.

I'm quite familiar with Eck and several New Age paths, most of which are innocent enough but, as with all things, readily abusive and too frequently out of touch with reality -- no balance! This is what costs such groups members like yourself, who are more left-brained than right. The leadership don't care because they want to passive sheep vs. those that might ask real questions and demand solid answers. The other side of this same coin is the fact that any organization created by "man" is instantly flawed because we are imperfect and in this arena usually arrogant, ego-driven, and readily exposed by way of "our" love for carnal treasure vs. spiritual harmony; just look at how many of these group leaders live in exceptionally nice dwellings, wear notable clothing designs, jewelry, nice cars, etc. (and the fundamental Christians are some of the worse for it, though the New Testament/Jesus himself, condemns such antics by clergy).

The true church exists but not as a cult or physical thing, it exists within our own heart and mind; we are the only thing capable of communion with the higher consciousness. While all those groups, philosophies, theologies, etc. each share a kernel of truth, they are all corrupt and in my book, as false as they are true. It's our obligation to find what gives us personal balance/harmony/serenity rather than conforming to someone else's whims -- take what works and fits us and do away with the rest, reviewing things every now and again because our journey is evolutionary; what we once rejects (weren't ready for) may very well make sense years later.

My mother is a dyed in the wool narrow-minded far right-winged Baptist that's so paranoid due to biblical ideology that it's paralyzed her, even leading to rejection of her own children to a degree. She cannot understand how I can acknowledge Jesus but not the church; my views are far more gnostic (eclectic) and therefore I see Jesus in the same light I see Buddha -- an enlightened HUMAN BEING -- a wise one that lived and created the miraculous based on his knowledge of natural things, not some magick wand or words that he uttered. I believe more the way of the Buddhists when it comes to such things and the Dahlia Lama himself says that "yes, Buddhism is a kind of atheism" in that Nirvana is found "within" based on one's studies, quests and accomplishments in life for the sake of life.

Bottom Line Is. . . I think you have simply given-up your quests on the spiritual level for the wrong reasons. I'm not challenging your present point of view, I understand it completely. But, given the various attempts you've made through the years I'm betting you will, if you honestly want to "know God" as you seem to have at one point, you will be able to blend all those teachings together in your mind and see where they share commonality and in so doing, you'll find your own spiritual center -- the serenity you are after.

Welcome!